Are you having a quarter life crisis?

14 October 2014

Apparently, it's not that uncommon. Here are 10 signs YOU are experiencing a quarter life crisis. #serious

1) You no longer regard Hollyoaks with the same warmth you once did

Firstly you’re far too busy on Sunday mornings to watch Hollyoaks Omnibus with cereal, a hangover and an unwashed duvet. Your Sundays are spent brunching and reading the Sunday Times. Besides, the characters are all far too young and you can’t relate anymore. The drama level of the Great British Bake Off is much more up your street.

2) Taylor Swift’s song ‘22’ is a cruel cruel lie!

‘It feels like a perfect night to dress up like hipsters and make fun of our exes’. Not sure about that Swifty, more like ‘It feels like one of those nights to pay your council tax and organize home insurance’

3) Students have become the enemy

What on earth are they talking about? Why can they not speak English? Was I that objectionable when I was a student? You have found yourself asking questions like that whenever you return to where you went to University. It’s advisable to leave your University City as soon as you graduate to avoid constantly being surrounded by them.

4) Marriage

Marriage is no longer a game of dress up but a harsh reality. People you actually know, your own peers, are getting married. When it comes to the actual wedding you can choose to act one of two ways; you network, socialise and work the room like the confident 20-something you are, or you get drunk. Both options are equally showing of your age. The one saving grace about going to weddings of your peers is that they are still ‘fun’ enough to enjoy a good novelty wedding.

5) One drink is still not an option

You are no longer the newbie at work. The boss no longer treats you as his coffee maker; he has a new graduate for that now. You now have people to actually manage yourself and they make your coffee! However, whenever you go for an after work social you think you can drink with the big boys on the fifth floor….which is not the case at all.  Things are made abundantly worse when these socials are mid-week. It’s a long way to Friday my weak bladdered, weak minded friend.

6) You have a love/hate relationship with payday

You know you have £0 disposable income yet you treat every payday like the day you get your student loan in. However, for that one day you can feel like Julia Roberts in pretty woman! Rodeo Drive Baby!

7) Dating is different

Internet dating is now acceptable. You’re no longer scared of accidentally chatting up someone in their mid-forties, what is scary is that you wouldn’t mind if you were. Internet dating is amazing; at least until you find out your new bae you’ve committed two weeks of tinder to isn’t a cat person.

8) You view your parents differently

On one hand you feel an element of bitterness towards your parents, they had children AND a mortgage at your age. How the hell did they afford to do that? Damn the 1980s and 100% mortgages! On the other hand though, you enjoy their company more than some of your friends. Your parents are real people and contrary to what you thought 10 years ago they really frikkin fabulous and much cooler than you.

9) You personify Nostalgia

Remember that amazing day at school where that really funny thing happened and you’re life was perfect? No! Because you’re lying to yourself. School definitely wasn’t as magical and you think it was.

10) You’re still young enough to not care

No money? Stressed at work? Single? Hung over? WHOCARES! You’re fabulous! (and deluded).

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